It’s snowing here this morning! October has started out to be a very gray and cloudy month. The coloring-changing leaves have passed their peak far too fast. I am not ready for winter.
Fortunately, I have a great memory of an October from way-back to brighten my entire month.
It was in October years ago, when M’Love proposed.
I love these types of stories – how did you meet, first dates, proposals, weddings…
Here’s a bit of our story… Forgive me if you’ve heard it before.
At that time, my life was super busy and difficult. I had big plans to change the world. I was pursuing my Bachelor’s degree while also studying early childhood, library media, and psychology.
One day my brother got married. I was a maid-of-honor in the wedding. Later that evening, one of the groomsman asked me to dance.
Eventually the groomsman and the maid-of-honor started dating. Long Distance. Because we were going to different colleges. And I was in no hurry to do anything, but make the world a better place. Besides, I really liked having control of everything in my own life. I planned to enjoy life as an old maid, as I was pretty sure I didn’t have the social skills or personality to thrive in a relationship (I’m an INTJ according to MBTI).
Oddly it turns out that groomsman was also an INTJ.
He got my attention by speaking my love of fact-based and personal responsibility language. He spoke of honor, equality, and fairness. He’s not the kind to shame people about the circumstances in which they have no control over. He was genuine and kind. He knew the acts of bravery it takes to chase dreams. He avoided mind/mood-altering substances and wasn’t embarrassed to say so.
I never felt uncomfortable sharing my life stories (the good, bad, and ugly). I felt free to talk about all my hopes and dreams, my fight for equality and good educations for all, wishes to travel the world, and live a fairy-tale life… He was the first person that didn’t make me feel embarrassed about who I was or where I came from. He didn’t chastise me for being a bookworm who loved to read, write, and learn. He didn’t call me wild because I was thrilled by nature, riding motorcycles, flying in airplanes, learning about outer space, and being happy. He liked those same types of things!?! It was exciting to find someone with so much in common. And even the areas where we disagreed, we could still respectfully discuss without devolving into raging lunatics. He made me want to be better, smarter, stronger, healthier, and just be the best me I could be. And I wanted the very same for him.
For two years, we sent hundreds of cards and letters in the mail (I still have all of these)! We talked on the phone about everything. We knew where each other came from, and where we were going.
Then one day, he drove a couple hours to visit me. Which was weird considering how far away his college was from mine. He was carrying a dozen roses. Was I so busy I didn’t know what holiday it was? Looking at the calendar, no it wasn’t a holiday.
I was having a Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. My last year of college was wearing me out. I was trying so hard to make sure my future was set so I could follow through on all my plans. I was focused on laying the groundwork to offer my child a future chance, and to give the world a make-over so all the kids could have a chance.
Then this young man who drove so far to see me, said some (extremely unexpected) Most Beautiful Words ever and Asked me to Marry him!
I paused, looked around, and whispered, “Are you sure?”
Because we might have a lot of Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Days. And my heart would never be able to take it if he changed his mind somewhere down the road.
He said, and I quote,
“I know my heart.”
And Suddenly here it is years and years later. I’m still deeply in love with this man! We’ve both fulfilled our college goals: his with computers, and mine in teaching, library, and other roles (I’m still hoping to make the world better.).
We’ve both been blessed to be the Bread-Winner and the Home-Maker in this relationship. Yay for True Love Teammates!
They loved their little boy with their whole hearts! Many years later, they’re lives became even more extra love-filled with brilliant grandbabies!
They all lived happily ever after!
The dry, shriveled blossom below was once upon a time the largest, most beautiful red rose from the October Proposal Rose Bouquet. It is still just as special as the day I received it.